More television time and non-fiction books are dealing with the issue of differences between the genders than ever before.  Famous talk shows and authors often devote show after show, book after book –  totally dedicated to helping the genders communicate more effectively with one another.  Quite often talk radio and even general television talk shows will illicit the help of panel of relationship authors or experts to focus on it clinically.  This normally results in the experts telling us why things are the way they are in relationships and the audience or callers commenting or posing questions that typically focus on the same question:   Why are men so difficult to communicate with?  This is a primary question for women who are trying to get ex back.

The reason that this is quickly arrived at as the central issue to be resolved is that the lack of willingness to talk about most serious issues, as explained by most women, is the real reason that the genders do not interact well.   Why this seems so difficult is often seen in its most basic aspects – motivation to communicate. 

Women are typically quick to engage in relationship issues – even intimate ones – at the drop of a hat.  This certainly can be easily seen, as women talk about a whole range of topics with literally everyone.   Men, however, really need a reason to communicate about substantive issues or deep debate.   This is especially true when it comes to communicating with their mate.  A man’s mind processes cognitive thought in a much different manner than does the mind of a woman, that is quickly engaged in cognitive thought on many levels.   Men, on the other hand, need a reason to communicate meaningfully about almost anything.  This is because men use their cognitive powers to solve problems rather than to ponder or debate them.   Communicating about it – the issue at hand – serves only to qualify the problem-solving challenge rather than debate its merits or worthiness.  Women simply cannot understand this.  Therein lies both the problem and its resolution.  For a woman trying to get ex back it is a godsend.

What a woman needs to understand is that her chances of genuinely engaging her mate – or her boss, for that matter – is to present the subject at hand as a problem to be solved.   This way she will easily engage the man’s cognitive thinking ability aimed at genuinely attempting to communicate about the issue – with more sincere interaction and improved outcome.   Whether you are just trying to really find out what he is thinking or trying to get your ex back you will find that it works.